Friday, April 30, 2010 8:05 AM

Nothing personal.

♥I'm on my way to work now, browsing on my blackberry while getting stuck in the Jan in a taxi, I chance upon an article, in loving memory of so and so. Yes, another young and innocent life has just been lost, yet again.

She is only 18 years old, studying well in a poly, yet due to unforeseeable and unforeseen reason and problems, she choose the path and ending her life to solve the issues that she has been facing. Reading this news, a sudden feeling of deja vu was invoked in me, it brought me back to 5 years ago, that fateful February, where I was just another secondary 3 boy, starting my life in preparation to go to where I am now, yet I receive a terrible news that fateful evening, when the school and my friends were frantically looking for me, and the news came, my former lower secondary classmate whom was closer to me then others, had took her own life.

I vividly remembered, that I asked my friend if she was kidding, but everything was confirmed, when my phone came ringing non stop. The next day to school, was the toughest, for the following weeks to come. And here I read a news on the incident, and given my profession, I have a lot of why to ask. I am not criticizing, but it merely my own personal views, I'm sorry if it offended anyone.

When My friend chose to took her own life back 5 years ago, my reaction was shocked, bewildered, and to an extent, citing that she made a stupid decision. Today, I stand point the fact that taking her own life, to me, was the biggest mistake she ever made. Considering that 5 years down the road, how much things would have been different. Just like me, 5 years down the road, I'm working the health care industry, doing my best to help doctors to save lives, back 5 years ago, my results was just another failing loser student, not sure where i will be, rebellious to the maximum, but 5 years later, I'm not what I was used to be, I decided to spend my life to save lives and make it as my life long career.

I believe that if my friend was still around, things would have been really different, not as the failure that she thought she was. Same for that 18 year old girl, 5 years down the road, you probably would have been doing well in life, but all that fell short, when you decided to make that hasty (I presume it to be hasty) decision to prematurely end your own life by your own hands via your own decision.

Why would you wana take your life? What is that Issue so big that death is the only way out ? Have you given a thought about how much hurt and damage may and will be done to your family and loved ones? I'm curious if this had went through at the point where you make your decision. I'm never supportive of people ending their own life prematurely, firstly because, I am helping to save lives. Everyday I go to work, my hope is to save more lives, that my patient can leave my ICU awake and discharge back home to a normal life. On a harsher note, I'll simply put it this way, Here Am I and my fellow colleagues of doctors and other health care professionals, doing our best, slugging out our guts to save patients, who are fighting so god damn hard to even survive in ICU, yet I see people casually throwing their lives away, like throwing rubbish into the rubbish chute.

I'm sorry, that was just on a harsher. Treasure your life, because out there, there are so many other people fighting so hard to just survive that one second more. I've seen so much death from my course of work, and a lot of them, are doing well in life, but due to circumstances of their health, everything was robbed from them.

Think about the consequences of your actions thoroughly, if it will hurt the people who loves you most because your action and decision, and I believe that if you do care for them, any Big problem that u deem as big that you are facing, will just seem like its nothing bigger then a mustard seed. Open up your inner eyes, and look deeper and further, a brighter future is awaiting after you leave that darkness, and you will see all your loves one, opening their arms, eagerly waiting to welcome you into the future that you deserved.

To save lives, I've dedicated my own life to it. The day I stop saving lives, is the day I will no longer Move. I'll never trade nursing for any other great jobs.

Monday, April 26, 2010 2:13 PM

First salary with cpf !

♥Finally got my first pay! After cpf, I like dog, need pay bills and save all these and that, how much will I left to survive ? Hais. What to do ?

I quite like my new workplace, colleagues are nice, sister are also rather nice, prolly because not trained yet, that's why no stress, after the course I'm attending now, it may just be a total different story. Oh man, I hope it will stay that way after training too.

My preceptors are actually very nice people, they rather willing to reach, and they actually tell me that they most of the time okay, but also got moody days, and told me that they may not be that nice during those days, hmm, nt bad already, count myself lucky.

Last sat, went out with a few colleagues to eat, we have so much laughter over the slightest stupidest thing, I enjoyed so much, they make me feel so fitting into the critical care family rather instantly, thanks a lot dude !

Well well, its still training, though its break time, I shall look forward to going home soon ! Till here !


You guys rocks, I thabk God for you guys! Thank you God !

Monday, April 05, 2010 11:16 PM

Fourth Chapter

♥Alright, Fourth Chapter of my life, Working+NS+Uni.

Today started first day of work, it was orientation. not bad lor, the food provided was decent. But then, as usual, my attention span is only 5 power point slides as usual. LOL.

Got posted to CCU. Well though I super sian and disappointed by it, but So many ppl tell me, you are placed there for a reason though you did not choose it, So I have decided. I shall not grumble and hope to see the vision and find the reason why God has placed me there.

I've moved out of the darkest period of my personal life, like finally ?! And yes, I'm ready to go into another commitment. But I shall dedicate the next 10 yrs to my career, before I shall think of settling down. For now, Shall just concentrate on 3 things. Career, Further Studies and LOSE WEIGHT, as usual, haha.

Its a short post. Till here.